The Jesus Bear

Welcome. I'd like to tell you a true story about a bear I came across years ago called The Jesus Bear.

There was a beautiful, and wonderful, woman in her late 30's diagnosed with breast cancer. After one round of aggressive chemotherapy and radiation, the cancer went into remission. Two years later, she kept getting pneumonia and her lower back kept hurting like she was in a car accident, yet she hadn't. X-rays showed her lower back to be slightly fractured, yet without any trauma happening, her doctor decided to forward the films off for a second opinion with her chest x-rays as well. Unfortunately, her cancer had returned, and it returned aggressively and in several places as well.

The breast cancer had metastasized to the spine, lungs, shoulder and liver. Once again, she went through chemotherapy and radiation to fight back the cancer, however this time it wasn't working. In November 1989, she was given six weeks to live and she flat told the doctor that wasn't going to work because her daughter was getting married in eight weeks. You see, my mother had planned to help walk me down the aisle as well as my step-dad.

The night of my wedding rehearsal, I could see my mom start going downhill. She made it to her goal. She was going to see me married. She was going to walk me down the aisle. My brother had a budding career in computer programming and could take care of himself financially now and she felt she could finally turn the both of us over to the Lord to take care of us as her job her on Earth was coming to an end.

Mom received a gift from either our Pastor, or my step-dad, of a teddy bear with a quarter taped to it's paw. You see, mom had given a bear, with a quarter, to the Pastor's wife's aunt as she was nearing death and was getting scared about it, and told her when she felt her time coming and was ready, all she had to do was take the quarter with her and make a call to Jesus to let Him know she was ready to come Home so He could come and get her. That bear helped the Pastor's aunt so much that she was never scared again.

As mom declined from December 1990 to May 1991, several times I had to move her Jesus Bear out of my way to help her get up out of her hospital bed at home, or to reach for the TV to change the channel for her on the days my employer would give me the day off to help take care of her.

On May 19th, 1990, my husband and I received the phone call I never wanted to receive. "If you want to say goodbye, you'd better get here fast" said my step-dad. Although we lived an 1 1/2hrs away, my husband made it to their house in forty-five minutes. Five minutes from my parents house, I got the impression of someone reaching for something and I held onto my old teddy bear I had brought with me even harder. I found out when we arrived I missed saying goodbye by five minutes. Once again, I had to move mom's Jesus Bear out of the way, only this time....mom's quarter was missing!! Mom had taken her quarter and made her call on her way Home. I've had people tell me throughout the years the quarter just fell off, but the quarter never showed up while we were cleaning up once the hospital bed was moved out and even the tape was missing off of her Jesus Bear.

I am reminded of the children's book I'll Love You Forever where the mom is rocking her child throughout the years even into adult hood telling the child how much she loves him saying "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be". When the mother becomes too old to do this, but still tries to, the child/man reverses roles and the phrase: "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my mommy you'll be".

This post is dedicated to Ruth Marion Hart October 24, 1946 - May 19, 1991

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